It can be quite difficult to approach each situation with the same mindset that we initially use to understand it. In the past, I found myself deeply rooted in a progressive way of thinking. However, after spending years dissecting cultural codes and norms through the lens of cursing, I have reached the conclusion that only a higher power can truly serve as a judge of our actions and moral choices. This realization has sparked within me an unquenchable thirst to delve into the mysteries of existence, to explore the depths of life and its complexities. The only kind of fulfillment I seek now is to allow myself to fully embrace this enigmatic way of thinking. Although I have not completely grasped the idea of divine goodness, I find myself longing every day for experiences that push the boundaries of my current understanding and imagination. At the same time, I wrestle with a deep sense of despair that often looms over me. I cope with this feeling by suppressing my frustrations, which sometimes leads to moments of breathlessness and emotional upheaval. As a result, I steer clear of thinking in black-and-white terms; instead, I find myself in a kind of in-between space, caught between faith and action. I choose to accept certain contradictions in my life as a means of maintaining balance and stability. When I reflect on my own salvation and the quest for peace, I simply call upon grace, a force that empowers me to restore my sense of security and well-being amidst the chaos of my thoughts and feelings.