The other day, as I was engaged in prayer, I found myself reaching out to the Lord in a moment of deep reflection. It struck me as quite mysterious, for I was grappling with a profound issue that seemed insurmountable. The core of my struggle lies in my inability to retain the richness of what I have experienced over the years. Despite dedicating the past thirty years to memorizing scripture, I find that my mind often fails me, and I cannot recall the verses as I once could. This limitation weighs heavily on my spirit, as I feel that my weakened condition hinders me from fully grasping the personal insights and revelations that have been bestowed upon me. It’s disheartening to think that all the effort I put into storing away these spiritual treasures in my heart may now seem futile in the face of my earthly frailty. This transformative experience unfolded in the context of my recent meditations on the Psalms. Over time, I have come to realize that many of the usual forms of communication I once had seem to have faded away. The alternative channels of inspiration and influence I now sense carry such a potent weight that I often feel lost in a state of awe and wonder, captivated by the glory that surrounds me. As I reflect on the teachings found in the Book of Revelation, particularly the first four chapters, I am reminded of the visions of heaven that have become etched in my memory. These images have reshaped my perception of reality itself, allowing me to see the world through a lens that elevates my experiences and interactions, revealing their transient nature. In this new perspective, as I engage with various portions of scripture, I find myself grasping the broader narrative—understanding the ultimate conclusion of all things. It's as if I am perceiving reality from a vantage point that transcends earthly existence, where the glory of God becomes vividly apparent, illuminated by the contentious yet magnificent vision of heaven. There are moments when I am overtaken by rapture, a sensation that feels almost like my spirit is being lifted from my physical being. It’s a feeling that is challenging to articulate, yet it resonates deeply within me, as if I am touching the divine in a way that defies explanation. During this time of prayer, I encountered a profound experience marked by a mysterious power that enveloped me, causing me to lose all sense of time. As I moved through my day, attending to my responsibilities and commitments, I felt waves of this divine influence wash over me—an experience that was utterly beyond my comprehension. I found myself yearning for something elusive, a deeper connection that I could not quite grasp.